Hoow too Avooid Hiring Lemoons, Noots, and Flakes

Sven’s former employer, the Olso Sanitation Institute, recently subscribed to a series of training seminars entitled “How to Avoid Hiring Lemons, Nuts, and Flakes”. Several Institute managers attended the seminars, hoping to pick up tips on how to spot those troublesome employees: the dreamers who believe their job is something more than a statistic to justify a bloated stock price, or the complainers who moan and groan about being stuck in a cubicle reminiscent of the inside of Darth Vader’s helmet, or the insufferable jokesters who don’t take the sanitation business seriously and only pretend to be janitors.

Those who attended were disappointed, however. The announcement of the seminars contained a misprint. The actual title was “How to Avoid Firing Lemons, Nuts, and Flakes”. It was a seminar intended for the managers of federal and state government employees.

Sven summed it all up: “Uff dah! Lemoons, noots, und flakes, eh? I doon’t knoow vhat dey talked aboout in der seminoor, but it shoor makes me hoongry foor a boowl uff cereal.”